Traditional Medicine

excerpts from the World Health Organization’s (WHO) website:

http://www.who.int/inf-fs/en/fact 132.html

September 1996 Fact Sheet N134

The term “traditional medicine” refers to ways of protecting and restoring health that existed before the arrival of modern medicine. As the term implies, these approaches to health belong to the traditions of each country, and have been handed down from generation to generation. Traditional systems in general have had to meet the needs of the local communities for many centuries. China and India, for example, have developed very sophisticated systems such as acupuncture and ayurvedic medicine. In practice, the term “traditional medicine” refers to the following components: acupuncture, traditional birth attendants, mental healers and herbal medicine.

A Dangerous Adventure

from The Education of Little Tree, by Forrest Carter (University of New Mexico Press, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 1976) pp. 108-113.

Grandpa taught me to hand fish. This was how, the second time in my five years of living, I nearly got killed. . . It was in the middle of the day, which is the best time to hand fish. The sun hits the middle of the creek and the fish move back under the banks to lie in the cool and doze.

This is when you lay down on the creek bank and ease your hands into the water and feel for the fish holes. When you find one, you bring your hands in easy and slow, until you feel the fish. If you are patient, you can rub your hands along the sides of the fish and he will lie in the water while you rub him.

Then you take hold behind his head, the other on his tail, and lift him out of the water. It takes some time to learn.

This day, Granpa was laying on the bank and had already pulled a catfish out of the water. I couldn’t find a fish hole, so I went a ways down the bank. I lay down and eased my hands into the water, feeling for a fish hole. I heard a sound right by me. It was a dry rustle that started slow and got faster until it made a whirring noise.

I turned my head toward the sound. It was a rattlesnake. He was coiled to strike, his head in the air, and looking down on me, not six inches from my face. I froze stiff and couldn’t move. He was bigger around than my leg and I could see ripples moving under his dry skin. He was mad. Me and the snake stared at each other. He was flicking out his tongue--nearly in my face--and his eyes was slitted--red and mean.

The end of his tail began to flutter faster and faster; making the whirring sound get higher. Then his head, shaped like a big V, begun to weave just a little, back and forth, for he was deciding what part of my face to hit. I knew he was about to strike me but I couldn’t move.

A shadow fell on the ground over me and the snake. I hadn’t heard him coming atall but I knew it was Granpa. Soft and easy, like he was remarking about the weather, Granpa said, “Don’t turn your head. Don’t move, Little Tree. Don’t blink your eyes.” Which I didn’t. The snake raised his head higher, getting ready to hit me. I thought he would not stop raising up.

Then, of a sudden, Granpa’s big hand come between my face and the snake’s head. The hand stayed there. The rattler drew up higher. He begun to hiss, and rattled a solid whirring sound. If Granpa had moved his had . . . or flinched, the snake would have hit me square in the face. I knew it too.

But he didn’t. The hand stayed steady as a rock. I could see the big veins on the back of Granpa’s hand like a bullet; but the hand never moved atall. I saw the needle fangs bury up in the meat as the rattler’s jaws took up half his hand.

Granpa moved his other hand, and grabbed the rattler behind the head, and he squeezed. The rattler come up off the ground and wrapped himself around and around Granpa’s arm. He thrashed at Granpa’s head with his rattling end, and beat him in the face with it. But Granpa wouldn’t turn loose. He choked that snake to death with one hand, until I heard the crack of backbone. Then he throwed him on the ground.

Granpa set down and whipped out his long knife. He reached over and cut big slashes in his hand where the snake had bit. Blood was running over his hand and down his arm. I crawled over to Granpa . . . for I was weak as dishwater, and didn’t think I could walk. I pulled myself to standing by holding onto Granpa’s shoulder. He was sucking the blood out of the knife slash and spitting it on the ground. I didn’t know what to do, so I said, “Thankee, Granpa.” Granpa looked at me and grinned. He had blood smeared over his mouth and face. . .

Granpa’s hand commenced to get bigger and bigger. It was turning blue. . . The arm was twice as big as his other one. I got scared. . . His face looked funny. Now his arm was turning blue.

“I’m going for Granma,” I said. I started off. Granpa looked after me and his eyes stared off, faraway.

Little Tree runs home to the cabin and out of breath tells his grandmother what has happened. She runs into the forest and Little Tree runs back when he catches his breath.

When I got there, Granpa was laying flat out. Granma had propped his head up, and the dogs was circling around, whining. Granpa’s eyes was closed and his arm was nearly black.

Granma had slashed his hand again and was sucking on it, spitting blood on the ground. When I stumbled up, she pointed to a birch tree. “Pull the bark off, Little Tree.”

I grabbed Granpa’s long knife and stripped the bark off the tree. Granma built a fire, using the birch bark to start it, for it will burn like paper. She dipped water out of the creek and hung a can over the fire and commenced to put roots and seeds into it; and some leaves that she had taken from the sack [her herbal plant collection]. I don’t know all of what was used but the leaves was lobelia, for Granma said that Granpa had to have it to help him breathe.

Granpa’s chest was moving slow and hard. While the can was heating, Granma stood and looked around. I hadn’t seen anything atall . . . but fifty yards off, against the mountain, there was a quail nesting on the ground. . . She brought the quail back, and while it was still alive, she split it from breastbone to tail and straddled it, kicking, over Granpa’s snake bite. She held the kicking quail on Granpa’s hand for a long time, and when she took it off, the quail had turned green all over its inside. It was poison from the snake. . .

I kept the fire going. Granma had me build another fire near Granpa’s head and so I kept them both going. Granma laid down by Granpa, holding close to him, for she said her body heat would help . . . and so I laid by Granpa on the other side; though I reckoned my body wasn’t hardly big enough to heat up much of Granpa. But Granma said I helped. . . I told her how it all happened, and that I reckoned it was my fault for not watching. Granma said it wasn’t anybody’s fault, not even the rattlesnake’s. . .

Granpa commenced to talk. He was a boy again, running through the mountains, and he told all about it. Granma said this was because he was recollecting while he was sleeping. He talked, off and on, all night. Just before dawn, he quietened and begun to breathe easy and regular. . . So I went to sleep in the crook of his arm.

Paragraph A

Sentence 1: Topic Sentence (ts)

Sentence 2: Idea of support (a)

Sentence 3: Idea of support (b)

Sentence 4: Idea of support (c)

Sentence 5: Summarizing sentence (s)

Paragraph B

Sentence 1: Topic Sentence (ts)

Sentence 2: Idea of support (a)

Sentence 3: Idea of support (b)

Sentence 4: Idea of support (c)

Sentence 5: Summarizing sentence (s)

Paragraph C

Sentence 1: Topic Sentence (ts)

Sentence 2: Idea of support (a)

Sentence 3: Idea of support (b)

Sentence 4: Idea of support (c)

Sentence 5: Summarizing sentence (s)

Paragraph A

As foreign teachers living on a Vietnamese campus we often encountered experiences new to us. We learned to rely on local wisdom and traditional remedies to maladies that were often suggested to us (ts). One time, my son broke out into a heat rash that covered his chest and back. After unsuccessfully trying several cures such as store-bought ointments, a student told us to boil huge amounts of mulberry leaves, to drink the broth, and then repeat the procedure when the rash reappeared once more. My son's rash disappeared as predicted (a*). This episode completely changed our skepticism about traditional medicine (s).

*As stated above referring to the topic paragraph, the number of sentences will vary according to the number of ideas that support the topic. In the case of Paragraph A, the support is anecdotal and therefore there is only one idea supporting the topic.

Paragraph B

Throughout my life, I have had the conviction that I would put into my body those things that are wholesome and healthy (ts). As a teenager growing up in the American 1960s, we often heard and saw around us the ill-effects of people using drugs and putting bad things into their bodies. So I veered away from overuse of even over-the-counter drugs to alleviate headaches, stomachaches and the like (a). I believed that my body was created in a way that had mechanisms that could fight off illness, and to take modern medicines would alter the innate ability of my body to strive for health (b). If medicine was needed, I felt that an educated use of herbal medicine enhanced the body's ability to fight off infection or a virus and one need not fear of overdosing on leaves or forming addictions (c). I felt that traditional medicine was safer to use and encouraged one to live a moderate lifestyle (s).

Paragraph C

I will never forget the feelings I've had of walking in an herbal garden (ts). To be one with nature and feel the warm soil, and in doing so, it warms the soul and slows down the hectic pace of life (a). I relish the feeling of having grown something that is good for the body--that is useful (b). Feeling a part of this earth and in harmony with nature is therapeutic in itself (c). The act of using herbal medicines, the process of preparing them, and being a part of traditions that have lasted for generations is good for a healthy lifestyle (s).

Concluding Paragraph

Sentence 1: Restating the topic Sentence and the supporting ideas (R)

Sentences 2-4: More sentences can be used to restate the topic and supporting ideas.

Concluding Sentence: (CS)

Example:

In this essay, I have explained that I think there is a place for traditional medicine in our lives today (R). I have had personal experience with its remedies (A). I believe it has a place in a healthy and chemically-free lifestyle (B). And I believe that living a lifestyle that cultivates herbs and is in harmony with nature nurtures well-being (C). As I grow older, I look for the balance in life and believe that the wisdom of our forefathers and mothers is of value for our lives today (CS).

Though I was born in the West having full access to modern medicine, I see the value of using traditional medicine for three reasons. I have seen first hand how an herbal treatment cured my son of a severe heat rash. Preferring a moderate lifestyle, I have often felt hesitant to put chemicals and pharmaceuticals in my body for fear of side effects or taking the wrong dosage. There is something attractive for me to be close to the earth and feel in harmony with Mother Nature. So through life's experience, fear of side effects, and wishing to feel close to nature, I find myself intrigued and accepting of traditional medicine.

As foreign teachers living on a Vietnamese campus we often encountered experiences new to us. We learned to rely on local wisdom and traditional remedies to maladies we often suggested to us. One time, my son broke out into a heat rash that covered his chest and back. After unsuccessfully trying several cures such as store-bought ointments, a student told us to boil huge amounts of mulberry leaves, to drink the broth, and then repeat the procedure when the rash reappeared once more. My son's rash disappeared as predicted. This episode completely changed our skepticism about traditional medicine.

Throughout my life, I have had the conviction that I would put into my body those things that are wholesome and healthy. As a teenager growing up in the American 1960s, we often heard and saw around us the ill-effects of people using drugs and putting bad things into their bodies. So I veered away from overuse of even over-the-counter drugs to alleviate headaches, stomachaches and the like. I believed that my body was created in a way that had mechanisms that could fight off illness, and to take modern medicines would alter the innate ability of my body to strive for health. If medicine was needed, I felt that an educated use of herbal medicine enhanced the body's ability to fight off infection or a virus and one need not fear of overdosing on leaves or forming addictions. I felt that traditional medicine was safer to use and encouraged one to live a moderate lifestyle.

I will never forget the feelings I've had of walking in an herbal garden. To be one with nature and feel the warm soil, and in doing so, one warms the soul and slows down the hectic pace of life. I relish the feeling of having grown something that is good for the body--that is useful. Feeling a part of this earth and in harmony with nature is therapeutic in itself. The act of using herbal medicines, the process of preparing them, and being a part of traditions that have lasted for generations is good for a healthy lifestyle.

In this essay, I have explained that I think there is a place for traditional medicine in our lives today. I have had personal experience with its remedies. I believe it has a place in a healthy and chemically-free lifestyle. And I believe that living a lifestyle that cultivates herbs and is in harmony with nature nurtures well-being. As I grow older, I look for the balance in life and believe that the wisdom of our forefathers and mothers is of value for our lives today.

Five –Paragraph Outline For Your Essay

Essay Title: __________________________________________________________

I. Introduction

A. Introductory statement___________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________

___________________________________________________________________

B. Thesis statement _____________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________

II. Body

A. First Supporting Idea: (Topic Sentence): ___________________________

1. ______________________________________________________

2. ______________________________________________________

3. ______________________________________________________

B. Second Supporting Idea: (Topic Sentence): _________________________

1. ______________________________________________________

2. ______________________________________________________

3. ______________________________________________________

C. Third Supporting Idea: (Topic Sentence): __________________________

1. ______________________________________________________

2. ______________________________________________________

3. ______________________________________________________

III. Conclusion

A. Closing statement ________________________________________________

Definition for Critical Thinking : A shift from viewing learning primarily as memorizing and repeating words and ideas heard in lectures and read in books to conceptualizing learning as a constantly evolving process of discovering, questioning, and reformulating hypotheses.

(from Celia Thompson, “Teaching Critical Thinking in EAP Courses in Australia,” TESOL Journal, Vol. 11, No. 4, p. 15.)

What is Writing?

Perhaps a simple answer to the question, “What is writing?” is: “putting pen to paper,” or “typing ideas into a computer.” But most of us would agree that writing is more than that. What is it that makes someone a good writer? What makes good writing? Can anyone really be taught to writes? When we define the elements of the writing act more clearly, then writing comes to life.

1. Writing is a response. Though writing feels like an individual act—the writer alone with his/her pen and paper or computer—writing is actually a social act. When we write we are responding something or someone around us. We write because we are reacting to something. Writing is a way in which we respond to the world and the people around us. We write for some particular purpose and we write for a particular audience in a particular context. When we write, we do so because we want, need, or have been required to write. We write for someone to receive and to react to what we have written.

Who will be the readers of what I write? Why do they want to read my ideas? When and where will be they be reading my writing? And what perceptions may these readers have of me as a writer?—These are all questions that create a context in which the writer will write. Choices and structures will be decided on because of this context. When one writes for a particular audience, one is aware of the reader’s expectations for the appropriate style, tone, level of vocabulary, and structures that one uses in the writing.

2. Writing brings organization to our ideas. The act of writing forces the writer to make connections and to sort ideas into an order that develops an idea. The idea is developed into a way in which another person can receive. “Seeing, creating, and exploring the relationship between ideas come through both language and the process of arranging the ideas for a reader that is writing. So not only does a writer need to ‘have’ ideas, but the writer has to put them in linear form, to ‘write’ them for a reader in order for them to be meaningful or to communicate. So, as we make choices about our words and ideas when we write, we immediately try to fit our choices into linear structures (which may or may not suit our habits of mind) that work in a particular context.” (http://www.unc.edu)

3. Writing is a process. “As we write, we constantly rewrite. Sometimes we do this unconsciously as we juggle words, then choose, delete, then choose again. Sometimes we do this rewriting very consciously and conscientiously as we reread a paragraph or page to critique for clarity, coherence, or simply to see what we’ve just said and to see if we like it. Having read, we rewrite the same phrases or ideas to make a closer match or refine our discovery through language. The process of writing and then reviewing, changing, rewriting is a natural and an important part of shaping expression for an anticipated audience. So while we are trying to put our words and ideas into a logical line, we are circling round and back and over again by way of creating that line.”

Thinking, planning, drafting and revising is the process of writing. Sometimes we need to see our ideas in writing in order to understand them. Writers must make decisions and choices about how to sort, what to include, and what is not necessary in order to communicate the idea of their writing.

(based on some ideas from http://www.unc.edu/depts/wcweb/pdf/writing.pdf)

nouns

verbs

adjectives

eucalyptus oil

a massage

to rub

holistic

herbs

coloration

to apply

wholesome

healers

discoloration

to massage

spiritual

acupressure

ointment

to heal

psychological

acupuncture

liquid

to restore

emotional

intervention

harmony

to connect

physical

medicine

balance

to touch

herbal

treatment

yin and yang

to meditate

therapy

meditation

physical exam

suction

herbal medicine

heat

pressure

salve

Fahrenheit-Centigrade
Conversion Chart

°F

°C

98.5°

99.0°

99.5°

100.0°

100.5°

101.0°

101.5°

102.0°

102.5°

103.0°

103.5°

36.9°

37.2°

37.5°

37.8°

38.1°

38.3°

38.6°

38.9°

39.2°

39.4°

39.7°

Fever

A fever is an abnormally high body temperature. It is a symptom, not a disease. A higher temperature is one way your body fights illness. Fever of up to 102° (39.2°) is generally beneficial, though it may be uncomfortable. Most healthy adults can tolerate a fever as high as 103° to 104° (39.7°) for short periods of time without problems.

Home Treatment

• Drink more liquids, especially water.
• Take and record temperature every two hours and whenever symptoms change.
• For fevers that cause discomfort, sponge with lukewarm water and take acetaminophen, aspirin, or ibuprofen to lower fever. Do not give aspirin to children or teens under age 20.
• Watch for signs of dehydration.

When to call a doctor

• Fever over 104° does not go down after two hours of home treatment.
• Persistent fever. Many viral illnesses, especially the flu, cause fevers of 102° or higher for short periods of time (up to 12 to 24 hours). Call a doctor if the fever stays.
• Fever over 103° with dry skin, even under the armpits (possible heat stroke)
• If fever occurs with other signs of a bacterial infection.
• If fever occurs with the following symptoms:

• Very stiff neck and headache (possible encephalitis or meningitis)
• Shortness of breath and cough (possible pneumonia or bronchitis)
• Pain over eyes or cheeks (possible sinusitis)
• Painful or burning urination(possible urinary tract infection)
• Abdominal pain, nausea , and vomiting (possible stomach flu, food poisoning or appendicitis)

• Call your doctor if fever is associated with disturbing or unexplained symptoms.

High Blood Pressure

High blood pressure (hypertension) occurs when the pressure of your blood against the artery walls is higher than normal.

Doctors rate blood pressure for adults over 18 in the following categories:

• Normal : 130/85 or below
• High-normal: 131 - 140/86 - 90
• High: over 140/90

High blood pressure usually has no symptoms. However, it increases your risk of stroke, heart attack, and kidney disease. Risks of these diseases are lowest for people whose blood pressure is below 120/80.

Risk factors for high blood pressure include

• African-American race
• Overweight
• Family history of high blood pressure
• Inactive lifestyle
• Excess alcohol intake
• Excess sodium (salt) intake
• Use of certain medications, including birth control pills, steroids, decongestants, and anti-inflammatories.

In some cases, high blood pressure can be prevented. Many people with high blood pressure can control it by changing their lifestyle and may not require drugs.

Taking the following steps is especially important if you are in one of the high-risk groups above.

Prevention

• Lose weight . This is especially important if you tend to gain weight around the waist rather than the hips and thighs. A weight loss of only 10 pounds can lower blood pressure.
• Limit your alcohol intake to two drinks or less per day. Too much alcohol increases blood pressure.
• Exercise regularly . Thirty to 45 minutes of brisk walking three to five time a week help lower your blood pressure (and will also help you lose weight).
• Reduce your salt intake.
• Make sure you get enough potassium, calcium, and magnesium in your diet. Potassium-rich foods include orange juice and potatoes. Calcium-rich foods include milk and dairy products, broccoli, and kidney beans. Magnesium-rich foods include leafy green vegetables and whole grains.
• Reduce the fat in your diet. Saturated fat is found in animal products (milk, cheese, and meat). Unsaturated fats are fats derived from vegetables, such as margarine and corn oil, and are found in chips, french fries, and doughnuts. Limiting these foods will help you lose weight and also lower your risk of heart disease.
• Stop smoking. Smoking increases your risk of heart disease and stroke.

Home Treatment

• Follow the prevention tips above even more closely if you have high blood pressure.
• Take any prescribed blood pressure medications exactly as directed.

When to Call a Doctor

• If you have had two or more blood pressure readings of 140 or higher systolic or 90 or higher diastolic. Call if either one or both numbers are high.

EXTERNAL

INTERNAL

head

arm

Face

Bones

Insides/Organs

Body

Products

hair

armpit

forehead

skeleton

brain

perspiration

neck

upper arm

eyebrows

skull

eardrum

sweat

shoulders

elbow

eyes

spine

sinuses

saliva

chest

forearm

eyelid

backbone

throat

spit

breast

wrist

eyelashes

vertebrae

larynx

earwax

middle

hand

eyeball

collarbone

tonsils

mucus

waist

palm

white

shoulder

windpipe

snot

abdomen

fist

iris

blade

lungs

tears

stomach

finger

pupil

ribs

heart

urine

hip

thumb

nose

pelvis

stomach

feces

bottom

pointer/index

bridge

hipbone

liver

oil

buttocks

middle

nostril

thighbone

kidneys

sperm

anus

ring

mouth

kneecap

appendix

eggs

penis

little/pinky

lip

pancreas

testicles

knuckle

tooth/teeth

large intestines

vagina

fingernail

tongue

small intestines

leg

heel

gums

bladder

thigh

instep

temple

womb

knee

sole

cheek

rectum

shin

ball

dimple

muscle

calf

toe

jaw

blood

ankle

big toe

chin

vein

foot

little toe

ear

artery

toes

toenail

earlobe

nerves

to sit

to belch

to swallow

to menstruate

to cry

to stand

to burp

to taste

to impregnate

to weep

to jump

to vomit

to take a pill

to fornicate

to sob

to leap

to throw up

to swallow a pill

to copulate

to moan

to hop

to eat

to take medicine

to weigh

to smile

to skip

to bite

to digest

to exercise

to grimace

to run

to chew

to urinate

to measure height

to grin

to twist

to nibble

to defecate

to groan

to bend

to spit

to have a bowel movement

to scowl

to flex

to laugh

to hold one’s breath

to see

to giggle

to blow one’s nose

to see with blurred vision

to visit the doctor

to see clearly

to cough

to measure one’s blood pressure

to have a check-up

to sneeze

to listen to one’s heartbeat

to hear

to dress

to wheeze

to perspire

to be deaf

to undress

to sniffle

to breathe

to be stopped up

to take one’s pulse

to gasp for breath

to take one’s temperature

to open wide (one’s mouth)

to smell

to feel one's glands

to have no sense of smell

to have a raspy voice

to stick out one's tongue

to be stuffed up

to have a sore throat

Paragraph #1

A genuine interest in various traditional practices now exists among practitioners of modern medicine, and the reasons for the interest in traditional healers as part of primary health care are many. It is a fact that most of the populations in various developing countries around the world depend on traditional medicine for primary health care. Traditional practitioners are a tremendous social link that is necessary for the delivery of primary health care needs. And medicinal plants are of great importance to the health of individuals and communities. So, because of the high percentage of world population using traditional healers, the healer’s social link to these populations, and the wealth of knowledge healer’s have about herbal healing, modern medicine now sees these traditional practitioners as a valuable resource.

The topic sentence:

___________________________________________________________________________

Supporting ideas:

(1)________________________________________________________________________

(2)________________________________________________________________________

(3)________________________________________________________________________

Summarizing sentence:

___________________________________________________________________________

Paragraph #2

A large proportion of the population in a number of developing countries still relies on traditional practitioners, including traditional birth attendants, herbalists and bone-setters and on local medicinal plants to satisfy their health care needs. These traditional healers are indigenous and a trusted part of the communities that are served. It is estimated that traditional birth attendants assist in up to 95% of all rural births and 70% of urban births in developing countries. To use such healers does not require a long journey from home and is affordable for most people in the world because it does not depend on the expensive importation of pharmaceuticals, technology and equipment.

What three reasons are given in the above paragraph to add detail to the first supporting idea in paragraph one: “ It is a fact that most of the populations in various developing countries around the world depends on traditional medicine for primary health care.”

Supporting ideas:

(1)________________________________________________________________________

(2)________________________________________________________________________

(3)________________________________________________________________________

Paragraph #3

The healers know the socio-cultural background of the people because they are born out of the culture, they practice traditional beliefs, and they are highly respected and experienced in their work.

Write the three supporting ideas from paragraph three.

(1)________________________________________________________________________

(2)________________________________________________________________________

(3)________________________________________________________________________

Can you finish the paragraph?

Paragraph #4:

Traditional practitioners can teach modern practitioners about medicinal plants. They are the oldest known health-care products. Knowledge of such plants has been passed down from person to person and generation to generation by oral tradition and at some point such information needs to be recorded. Medicinal plants are also important for pharmacological research and drug development. To understand how these plants and their use can be intertwined in the field of modern medicine, one must embrace the ancient knowledge as a thing of value. And it is the traditional healers who can teach it if modern practitioners are willing to learn from them.

Summarize this essay (paragraphs 1, 2, 3, and 4) in a closing paragraph.

Choose A or B:

A. Finish this sentence:

I think that there is a place in the modern world for traditional medicine for these three reasons:

(1)________________________________________________________________________

(2)________________________________________________________________________

(3)________________________________________________________________________

B. Finish this sentence:

I think that there is no place in the modern world for traditional medicine for these three reasons:

(1)________________________________________________________________________

(2)________________________________________________________________________

(3)________________________________________________________________________

Five –Paragraph Outline For Your Essay

Essay Title: __________________________________________________________

I. Introduction

A. Introductory statement­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­___________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________

___________________________________________________________________

B. Thesis statement _____________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________

II. Body

A. First Supporting Idea: (Topic Sentence): ___________________________

1. ______________________________________________________

2. ______________________________________________________

3. ______________________________________________________

B. Second Supporting Idea: (Topic Sentence): _________________________

1. ______________________________________________________

2. ______________________________________________________

3. ______________________________________________________

C. Third Supporting Idea: (Topic Sentence): __________________________

1. ______________________________________________________

2. ______________________________________________________

3. ______________________________________________________

III. Conclusion

A. Closing statement ________________________________________________

1. Content:

• Is the paragraph interesting?

2. Organization:

• Are all the sentences about one topic?
• Are the sentences ordered in a logical or interesting way?
• Does the paragraph have a good topic sentence?

3. Style:

• Is the paragraph smooth or choppy?
• Are the best words used in the paragraph, or are there synonyms that would make it sound better? (read the paragraph aloud and hear how it sounds)
• Are there prepositional phrases that can help move from one sentence to another?

1. Content:

• Does the topic of this paragraph support the main idea of the first paragraph?
• Does the topic of this paragraph elaborate on or add detail and examples to an idea of support in the first paragraph?
• Is the paragraph interesting?

2. Organization:

• Are all the sentences about one topic?
• Are the sentences ordered in a logical or interesting way?
• Does the paragraph have a good topic sentence?
•  

3. Style:

• Is the paragraph smooth or choppy?
• Are the best words used in the paragraph, or are there synonyms that would make it sound better? (read the paragraph aloud and hear how it sounds)
• Are there prepositional phrases that can help move from one sentence to another?

1. Content:

• Is there a sentence that restates the topic?
• Are support ideas restated?
• Is the paragraph interesting?

2. Organization:

• Are the sentences ordered in a logical or interesting way?

3. Style:

• Is the paragraph smooth or choppy?
• Are the best words used in the paragraph, or are there synonyms that would make it sound better? (read the paragraph aloud and hear how it sounds)
• Are there prepositional phrases that can help move from one sentence to another?